All psychopaths follow the same strategy when operating in intimate relationships. I know this strategy well because I was in a relationship with a psychopath for around four years.
I also know other women who have dated and are dating psychopaths. Some of them are still abused, some of them had their lives totally destroyed. Only a few manage to break out, and the only reason that they do is covered at the end of this article.
Many people mistake normal persons for narcissists or psychopaths. Many humans these days display psychopathic traits because we are ruled by the psychopathic elite.
The elite controls us through the media, and therefore, many people have their values and behavior changed as a result of this negative influence. They become more psychopathic due to such influences, though they will never become real psychopaths.
I think the reason the elite cause humans to become more psychopathic is so that real psychopaths could more easily blend into society, and that humanity would no longer be able to tell right from wrong.
Real psychopaths can be recognized by their eyes. You may not be able to see anything different about their eyes at first (though that is possible in some too), but if you keep your attention on their eyes, you will eventually see that behind those eyes there is emptiness.
Looking at their eyes can be compared to looking at the bottomless abyss. You might even feel your spirit wanting to run away from what it sees in those dead eyes.
Their eyes look reptilian – they are as dead as the eyes of a lizard. That’s, I believe, the most sure way to tell whether a person is a psychopath or not.
.Another way to tell whether a person is a psychopath is to look for predatory behavior. All psychopaths, like predators, follow specific predatory steps. For example, a spider will follow a specific way to capture its prey; so will the lion. And so will the psychopath.
The psychopaths that I know are territorial. I don’t know if it applies to all of them, but this is very likely to be the case. They will hunt for prey like lone wolves and they will have their own particular territories that belong only to them, from what I’ve observed.
The strategy that the psychopath uses to enslave a victim into an intimate relationship is as follows (though the steps may not necessarily be followed in this order):
- Seduce
- Exalt – love bomb
- Bond
- Trauma bond
- Entrap
- Use up
- Discard
Let me go into each stage to explain it more in detail.
The first stage: seduce
(In this article, I choose a male psychopath and a female victim as an example. Psychopaths, however, can be either male or female.)
When a psychopath first meets his victim, he will try to seduce her. He will do so by learning what kind of partner the woman desires. Psychopaths are excellent character readers, so they will quickly figure out what kind of partner the woman desires and he will become him.
Psychopaths can read people like books; through different clues, they understand whether the woman prefers a submissive boyish boyfriend, or a very mature and manly partner.
At the stage of seduction, the psychopath will also try to mimic the victim so that she finds him interesting and he gains her trust. It’s now well-known through such methodologies as NLP that mimicking a person’s body language, for example, helps to form a friendly tie with a stranger. Psychopaths know this without the study of NLP. It’s in their blood to mimic the victim to gain their full trust.
The psychopath will mimic the victim in many ways. For example, he might adapt a similar dress style (formal, casual, sports, seductive). He might mimic the victim’s speech patterns, smile, attitudes, body language, and he might even use a similar-smelling perfume. He may adopt the victim’s values and aspirations.
What’s more, he will attract the victim through his self-confidence and good looks. Self-confident people are naturally attractive, and psychopaths know that they are found attractive because of this trait. So they will try to seduce the victim through their self-confident and daring behavior.
They might also fascinate the victim by their lifestyle, which is usually extreme or dangerous in some way. For example, they might be fast bike-riders or be involved in anything else as dangerous, because they seek such experiences so that they don’t feel dead within.
The second stage: exalt and love-bomb
At this stage, the psychopath will try to impress the victim to the degree that her entire focus is on him. He will try to become her personal hero, or, I might as well say, god.
He will try to make himself into her only idol; he will attempt to achieve the objective of the victim thinking mainly about him.
He will go more than an extra mile for her; he may act like a perfectly selfless gentleman at this stage. He may buy her many gifts. He will give her many compliments.
He will profess his undying love for her. He may tell that he has never met such a special person before. He will spend all his free time with her and she will be his only source of focus.
This, of course, feels amazing and so the victim will indeed think that she is special to him. She’s likely at this stage to start falling in love with him. She will get addicted to his attention.
He wants her to get addicted to so much attention from him so that later on he could deny it.
The third stage: bond
At this stage, the psychopath will share his deepest secrets with the victim. Those are likely to be no secrets at all but lies, since psychopaths are liars and they only tell the truth when they think it would be of some benefit.
The reason he discloses such “secrets” is so that the victim would disclose her secrets also, so that this would be used against her later on. He also does this to further bond with her.
He will also try to find out her weaknesses by careful observation and indirect questions. When people share their weaknesses with others, this strengthens the relationship bond.
Another reason a psychopath would want to know the victim’s weaknesses is so that he would use them against her at a later stage to totally crush her self-confidence.
At this stage, he will also try to get her into a sexual relationship, because he knows that sex bonds deeply. Psychopaths crave raw and intense experiences, so the sex is likely to be frequent, fierce, and maybe even violent.
The psychopath will try to get his victim addicted to having sex with him because he wants the victim to become addicted – he wants her to become his slave.
He might be excellent at love-making, since he is likely to have had many victims to practice on. Sex, in my opinion, is one of their greatest tools for enslavement of the victim, since most people become easily addicted to sex, and psychopaths know that very well.
At this stage, the psychopath will spend a lot of time with the victim to get her total trust and so that all her doubts about him disappear. Thus, the victim will become fully trusting of the psychopath and deeply in love with him. And when this full trust and total love is achieved, the psychopath will deal the first blow.
The fourth stage: trauma-bond
After the psychopath is certain that the victim loves him and she fully trusts him, he strikes the first blow – he either suddenly becomes indifferent, or violent, or involves her in a love triangle.
He might use any other strategy too. The main purpose of that strategy, whatever one he chooses to use, is to cause intense emotional upset or shock in a victim.
He does that for a few reasons. First, trauma bonds the victim even more to the psychopath. This is because the victim starts associating intense feelings experienced during trauma with the person who caused it, and this creates a very strong bond.
The same scenario can be witnessed in mind-controlled slaves when the mind-controller first love-bombs and then hurts the slave; the same can be witnessed in some rape cases where the victim becomes so attached to the rapist that she even thinks she loves him.
The second reason the psychopath uses trauma bonding is because the victim discharges intense emotional energy which he absorbs. Since he is a dead spiritual being devoid of feelings, he enjoys feeding off the intense feelings of others.
Another reason he uses trauma-bonding is to put the victim into an altered state of consciousness. The victim gets into a spellbound state because of cognitive dissonance – the brain cannot comprehend how an absolutely loving person can suddenly turn violent or indifferent.
This is incomprehensible to the human mind, because humans don’t act this way. And since most victims do not know that psychopaths aren’t humans, this causes a sort of split in the mind which puts the person into a highly vulnerable and suggestible state.
The psychopath will use this state to further enslave the victim – he will use hypnotic speech patterns to rationalize his unpardonable behavior, and the victim, being in such an unwholesome state, is likely to believe in the psychopathic lies, getting further imbalanced and confused.
If the victim doesn’t understand the game of the psychopath, he may keep her in this trauma-bonding stage for years, until she loses her mind or is destroyed in other ways to the degree that he is no longer able to use her and therefore, discards her.
I recently heard that the end goal of all psychopaths is to make their victims die in some way, and I totally agree with that.
But he won’t rush the process. He wants the energy source – he doesn’t want to kill fast. So he will let the victim recover from the shock by profusely apologizing and being exceptionally nice to her, again spending all his time with her.
When the victim feels recovered and happy again, the psychopath strikes the blow again. And this trauma bonding may go on for years, until the victim is totally destroyed.
This strategy will never change, though it might take time for trauma bonding to be repeated, depending on how long it takes for the victim to regain her trust in the psychopath.
Should the victim decide to end the relationship, the psychopath will do everything he can to get her back. He will go through all the entrapment steps and will keep repeating them until trust is regained.
He will love-bomb her, buy many gifts, use hypnotic language to change her mind, shed crocodile tears and promise to never do it again (whatever he did).
He will send multiple messages or will call many times. He will use such strategies every day until the victim decides to give him another chance. And then he will strengthen the bond to the degree that the victim fully trusts the psychopath so that the next trauma causes her to again discharge intense emotional energy which he will absorb.
The fifth stage: entrap
At this stage (this can also be done earlier in the relationship) the psychopath will try to entrap the victim but will remain free himself. This can be done in many ways, depending on the circumstances.
For example, the psychopath may choose to impregnate the victim and thus the dependency/trap is created through the child. The psychopath may marry a Christian but then cheat her, and the Christian woman would be kept in the marriage because of her conviction that divorce is wrong.
The psychopath may isolate the victim from all the friends and family so that she only has him to rely on.
Basically, he will assess the victim’s circumstances and will decide what’s the best way to entrap her so that her freedom is limited yet he himself remains free.
This will allow his other pursuits to be kept secret (he is likely to have many victims as such) and will give him flexibility in seeing the victim whenever he chooses. The victim, however, might be denied such freedom.
For example, I know one Indian lady who got entrapped this way. He got sexually involved with the psychopath before marriage, and that’s a big taboo in India.
Although the woman loved him and wanted to get married to him, he didn’t share the same future plans. Instead, he told her that he could not marry her because she was one year older than him (!). So the psychopath came up with a plan to get her married to his relative. She agreed.
Now he has easy access to her at any time, because he, as a relative, can visit her home without any suspicion. She, however, cannot visit the psychopath because she’s a married woman, so she cannot go to his house.
This allows him to have multiple women and remain uncaught most of the time (since he has many women, she still ends up catching him sometimes).
He impregnated her and told her to abort the baby, and she did. When, during her pregnancy, she found out that he was again cheating on her, she almost committed suicide.
She’s totally trapped, yet she continues to cling to him because she thinks she loves him. The reason she thinks so is because he got her addicted to sex, closeness, and she also associates intense emotions with him. Since she’s an uneducated village girl, she doesn’t understand the real causes of such a bond and therefore, in her mind, she thinks that he’s the right person for her.
He also hypnotizes her with his speech patterns. Since she doesn’t understand that he’s not like a normal human being (I tried to explain that to her but it just went over her head), she continues hoping that he will someday fall in love with her and that he will change.
So that’s how cleverly psychopaths can entrap their victims. They are smart, and they will premeditate the best plan of action. Since they are excellent actors, their suggestions that finally entrap you may seem as though serving your best interests, but that’s never the case.
The psychopathic elite behaves the same way – they create a problem and then invent a way out of that problem that further entraps or damages humanity.
The psychopath will use different entrapment strategies on his victims depending on their circumstances. Then, like a spider, he will freely move from victim to victim within his own created net to suck out their life energy and money.
If a few victims are located close to each other, the psychopath will try to set them against each other so that they never become friends and therefore, are unable to exchange information. This way the dark deeds of a psychopath may remain undetected for years.
The sixth stage: use up
The psychopath will continue using a similar set of strategies on all his victims. Most victims will not find out about each other due to the psychopath’s excellent lying and secrecy skills.
The psychopath will regularly use all his victims to get their emotional and sexual energies as well as money. He will give some time for the victims to recover, and then will deplete them again. He will do it as long as there’s anything left to benefit from his victims.
The seventh stage: discard
Finally, when the victim is unable to be used for some reason (old age, poverty, illness), the psychopath will coldly discard her. He will do so in the most hurtful way, to deal a final, sometimes deadly, blow to the victim.
The victim, if she’s not aware of psychopathy, will never comprehend how a human being could be so cruel. Some victims will commit suicide. Some will start consuming alcohol or drugs. Others may self-destruct in other ways.
Some will recover, but will never be the same; as ghosts that haunt houses, the thoughts about the abuser will visit the victim for the rest of her life. Only very few victims fully recover, and these are the ones who have their priorities right, as you will read below.
The only way to protect yourself
The only way a victim can protect herself from total psychopathic destruction is by having her priorities right. That’s the reason the psychopath that I was in a relationship with was unable to destroy me.
He got to the stage three, and he even tried trauma-bonding with me, but that didn’t work in a way that he planned. That’s because he was never number one in my life.
Psychopaths will try to make them into victims’ personal gods. They will try to make themselves into the most indispensable people in victims’ lives. And when victims allow this to happen, they have just based their whole lives on a very shaky foundation.
When the psychopath understands this has been accomplished, he will keep traumatizing the victim until she’s totally destroyed. But if the victim refuses to make him into her idol, she may get hurt because of his inhumane behavior, but she will never be fully destroyed.
Spirituality was always number one in my life. Then came my business. And only then – my ex-partner. That’s the reason I escaped from his deadly clutches.
Yet another thing that helps to survive psychopathic abuse is the firm understanding that a psychopath is not fully human. He operates through the reptilian brain, in a predatory manner.
When you really understand that, it’s much easier to get detached from the abuser, heal and move on.
Is there any hope for the psychopath? I know one, and I desperately need to get help for this person.
If he’s real psychopath, I don’t think so, as it’s another seedline.
um, the most accurate part of was ‘how to protect yourself’ but otherwise, the truth is sociopaths/psychopaths come in all shapes, sizes, personalities, looks etc.
no, they are not all charming or confident or good looking though they may be arrogant to compensate or even pretend to be obsequious when they are hiding malicious and selfish intent. some are downright ugly, passive aggressive, perverts, lowlives etc. i mean some are even rapists and child molesters too.
from my experience, sociopaths/psychopaths are ugly people inside and out usually. but also can be attractive on the outside but ugly on the inside once they reveal their true colors but because most people aren’t attractive anyways. the odds are they are the ugliest or average of all which has been my experience.
Maybe you’re ugly
Since all you think about is negativity
Married a socipath diagnosed after marriage (of course) . Now married to 2nd husband who’s behavior is not on the “normal” spectrum based on what I think is normal, nonrageful behavior. Please keep warning people. Socipathy is charming, caring and warm on the front end but it is not real. It will suck out your every ounce of life you have if you let it. It is a human parasitic relationship.
Asperger people are the ones who rage constantly
Not psychopaths
My 17 year old son has entered a relationship with a genetic psychopath 6 years old than him. I really would like a consultation with you. We were Pinot h preyed on and I have tried to protect him but I can’t.
Thank you, Joanna. My consultation service is here: https://simonarich.com/consult
Hello,
Thank you for such a well written piece that resonates very well with my experience. Within the article there is a sentence which says ‘psychopaths aren’t human’, which is highlighted as a link but the link is broken. Could you elaborate of fix the link? Many thanks
No unfortunately not. I was involved with one for 2 1/2 years. It was a very tough pill to swallow that he will never ever change. It still is a tough pill to swallow but I’m so happy I escaped his deadly bite. Good luck to you
I am happy for you I am in the process of healing from the bite
Thank you, very beautifully and clearly described. Absolutely agree and you are right – they try and get you to think they are God, but thank goodness they are not. Never worship anyone or anything before the true God.
You don’t know who the true god is
Yahweh won’t let you know
This article is outstanding. I escaped the psychopath mostly undamaged because of the same priorities as you: God #1, business/responsibilities, and the ex was after that. That relationship lasted 1.5 years and ended 11 years ago.
I recall telling him God is number one for me always.
Priorities, yes. Thank you, I will print this for my daughter to read when she is older.
I also have been involved with a psychopath for 4.5 years. We split up 4.5 years ago now ironically, and it’s only in the last two weeks I discovered he was a psychopath – by accident!! To be honest the revelation has been beautiful, at least I no longer feel like I am going mad anymore! I feel now I can better equipt myself against this reptile when he does come back again and that is to run fast and far lol And yes I have to agree with the end of this article place GOD as your number one and he will carry, protect and guide you. Tears actually came into my eyes at the end of this article as I was amazed to see God and Jesus mentioned! Even when I do not know it God Is in the mists of everything in my life. God wants all his children to be free and if you trust him he willl lead you into the truth that will set you free from any bondage through the power of his son who died for us all!! Let the redeemed say so!!
Thank you for this article and may the Creator bless and guide you and everyone else who reads this.
So I’m not sure if anybody actually pays attention to this page anymore, or comments anymore, but it was interesting to come across. As I am in a relationship with somebody. The difference is, I am the psychopath. And we thought it was kind of interesting to come across your article due to the fact that this is unlike anything else we’ve seen. One main difference though, between what you describe and how our relationship is working, is the fact that I have always been Completely open about the fact from the very beginning. In doing so has completely changed the dynamic, because they were more educated about what to expect. Men are assholes to begin with, a fact that I am completely aware of, and find myself apologizing for quite frequently. But just because you’re a psychopath doesn’t mean this is how you operate. I spent seven years working as a fraud and financial crimes investigator for the DOJ. I prefer to use my skills/techniques/toolkit, many of which can be used for exactly what you have described, to instead make trouble for people that make trouble for others. So it’s not right to write somebody off just because there a psychopath. Chances are they’ve not actually been diagnosed as well. They’re just a super manipulative douche bag.
I am quite positive that the father of my child is a psychopath. All of these characteristics describe him well enough. Or maybe it describes me well enough. Haha, to say I was victimized is a stretch. He wasn’t diagnosed but then he would go into quite the rage at the mention of even going to counseling. He did so many cruel things and there were times after that when he would cry even. But if I held out on my compassion, I often saw him switch. Or change, right before my eyes. It has been five years and I haven’t seen him in 3 of them. Haven’t talked in over 2 years. He destroyed everything I thought I was haha all is true. BUT I am far from normal. I knew he was predatory, as she described in the article. And unlike the other “victims” I FELL in love with THAT. A psychopath is definitely different. And he was and has been the only one to accept me as I am. We bonded in other ways than she described, as well. For example, I adapt to my surroundings. I can be molded, willingly, to however pleases or secures someone the most. I lack a sense of “self” and because he is as he is, he has been the only one to provide me a certain clarity. But, when I became pregnant, I believe his hopes of holding on to me backfired. He couldn’t shape me because I wanted to be better for my child. He showed absolute indifference to her. I am not religious, so what severed us was my child.
I’m a female 31year old secondary psychopath. I feel nothing for my family and friends (I see them the bare minimum I possibly can, they are just an inconvenience). Secondary psychopathy means i was born neurotypical but a trauma/abuse in early childhood causes the brain to shut down as a defence mechanism) so although I don’t care about family/friends (i of course want then to be happy) I am capable of caring (although i can’t feel guilt and I don’t believe i can feel love) I cry every day several times a day over aparthied Israels war crimes and genocide of the innocent Palestinians. I’d feel nothing if France and Italy went to war but can identify with Palestine because they have NO military yet apartheid Israel have a navy, 2 armed forces and an air force and they call their victims the terrorists when they are in fact the new Nazis inflicting a modern day holocaust on the poor Palestinians. Apartheid Israel crimes against humanity are the same as a child getting beaten by an adult (acts apartheid Israel carry out daily anyway) ..it’s not equal, it’s an injustice. I don’t care if one person bombs a school (although of course i’d rather no suffering ever occoured i just can’t feel anything when it does unless I morally identify with it). I’d feel nothing if a friend had a still birth (I’d of course comfort them but inside there’d be no emotional response in me) yet i cry my eyes out when apartheid Israel celebrate murdering CHILDREN and shooting pregnant women in their BABY bump. I also can not tolerate prejudiced of ANY kind yet I get an equal mix of aroused/giggly on reading about/seeing serial killers crimes yet would be outraged at racism/xenophobic/homophobia etc. I’m in a relationship with 38year old male primary psychopath, and even i (knowing EVERYTHING about psychopathy in all it’s forms.. if something is of interest to or relates to us personally, psychopaths will become experts on the subject.. why we’re always amazing in bed.. because WE like sex) am hoping (although fully aware he’s incapable of love) that i’m different for him. On eye contact i knew he was a psychopath (we can know just by 3 seconds glance if someones else is a psychopath, I knew instantly he was a primary distempered psychopath), he admitted to me his psychopathy after 3months, the next day I admitted to him i too am a psychopath and he said “i know baby your eyes told me”. He’s told me about acts he did in childhood (the majority of the acts are abhorrent to me.. but likely a test to see if I’d still want him after discovering he’s done things I disagree with) he’s admitted to me he’s a professional liar, told me about how he destroyed/broke every other women.. and while the parts of my brain that appear neurotypical wish this is because he’s finally found someone he can be his true (the good/the bad/and the very bad) self with, my psychopathic predatory brain knows it’s because he knows my psychopathy means that i technically am capable of (I don’t know love) but genuine affection (whereas primary psychopaths brain chemistry means they can only respond to pleasure receptors in the brain being lit up) so am i just the ultimate prize to ruin for him.. a psychopath breaking another psychopath. I myself don’t play with people, not because I find it morally unacceptable but because it’s no challenge. I always say for psychopaths when we make eye contact with neurotypicals it’s a cat looking at a mouse but when we look into another psychopaths eyes it’s tiger sizing up tiger. But 90% of psychopaths toy with others for fun. The whole point of me sharing all this is to warm others from ever entering into a dalliance with a psychopath, you will NOT win. I don’t want to win I just want it to last.. but eventually he will get bored. After he discards me i can shut my brain down and go full on psychopathic to escape the pain but neurotypicals can not protect themselves in such a manner you either have to be destroyed by the pain or accept and work through it. If you play with a psychopath you will not just het burned you will get burned alive
Thank you for writing this. As a neurotypical who had a 2 year relationship with a psychopath, I appreciate your honesty. This experience almost broke me.
what I felt about psychopaths is bit different. as I have identified they have a charm and beauty. they seems to be very good people. their “eyes shine” pure white and clear . this is what I could identify . For normal people who have experianced pain they wont have this pure white beautiful eyes and they will use you without you even identifying as they seems to be extremely good .
Thank you thank you thank for writing this article. I suspected I was in a relationship with a psychopath. I just experienced the 3rd trauma-bonding instance in the relationship (which landed him in jail for the second time (assault)). The first time I changed/rewrote the police report so he didn’t get charged with anything.. this time he and his family want me to appear at the arraignment to drop charges.. but I won’t. This clarified so many unanswered, mind boggling questions I had. Thank you again for this
This is an awesome article I came across. I am married to a psychopath for 8 years and truly became numb to his manipulations, but just last 4 years. It’s pretty easy to coop with it when you actually know what to expect. It’s kind of amusing for me now and even interesting to look what he is going to do. We both found out what was going on with our relationship after he tried to destroy me by putting in all sorts of trouble and charging me with crimes after I tried to leave him. Hopefully I recorded most of it so he got in trouble with law for lying. It was very tough and we do have a child too so it’s even worse then if it was only two of us. I tried to brake the cycle 8 times but I am a foreigner and he didn’t agree to give my daughter my citizenship so I can’t take her away and of course I won’t leave without her and he knows it. Stupid laws that you always need a fathers permission. That’s the only one reason I am still with him. He won’t allow me to work or have friends or even drive a car or talk to my family a lot and go to church, o have no support in this country, but he buys everything for me and knows that I know what he is doing so he is a little more calmer then several years ago. He knows I am numb to his manipulation and will not let him destroy my soul. I keep myself in a good shape and leave a healthy life style caring for him. Unfortunately he destroyed relationships with my parents pretty bad by telling lies about me and I was looking for an article to send to my father that he can read and understand what are we dealing with and this article is truly explaining it in a pretty easy way. I hope my father will understand me now. I pray for my husband every day no matter what, even being a soulless reptile it is exhausting and miserable life he has full of hate and lies, filthy dirty plans that won’t work on me the way he wants, having no friends or family around because he destroys everything positive. Somehow he is copping with this too, just like me.
What is the difference between clinically diagnosed psychopaths and people who exhbiti traits of it. Are they all considered to be reptiles despite their difference in instability? Thank you
Reading this article and all what you said in the article is something like I’m reading an article which describes everything i have faced and also what i really think about pyscopaths…n the line u say that pyscopaths are not humans..i truly agreee to it..even my story is the exact copy of what you have written about .this is the 1st time in my kife m finding a person who has same thoughts n ideology like me…this article is really a great one..
N u said right if a women or any person keeps god first then god saves him…same happened with me too..
It was nice reading this article
What if you all are currently married to a Psychopath and do not realize it, you think you have walked away from all that a…nd are smarter than most, I am here to tell you that the god of religion is Satan and he was the original psychopath,truth has a way of pushing us in the right direction. About “God” while it is true that having no idols before Him will redeem us and that is a very lovely insight, but it is also true that the religious concept of “love me or burn in hell” is psychotic in and of, itself. What if I were to tell you that the god you know is Satan and it was prophesied that the world shall bow to Satan, as god and they have, did you think this would not include you? What if I were to tell you that St. Paul is a dupltictious psychopath and it can be proven without a doubt by his won words and matching those words to what was written before Shaul/Paul came along to say “[Hinneh] pay close attention you have [shamar] listened to and heard it before, BUT I PAUL SAY…” a man who called the ‘god of the book “Porneos” and admitting in his own words to being demon possessed and quoted Dionysis with his tag line “It’s hard to kick against the goad” which can be found by simply studying classic Greek lit. and matching it to St. Paul’s words, that is the character of reality of St. Paul but everyone seems to exhibit the most admirable cognitive dissonance I have ever seen concearning him and refuse to hear the facts about Paul/Appollos. Was the God of the book o unreliable that a man like Paul was needed to come and change the entire plan? Because that is what he did and I can prove it with evidence, evidence, evidence, without reason and logic God can not be known.
This so true. I just broke up with a psychopath. I went through the four steps but I was able to break up with him during the trauma bond. He was furious and he felt used and abused. Thank you very much for the article because I read this article while I was trying to understand what kind of man I was with. I decided to break up immediately after reading this article.
Hi all
I am dealing with a psychopath right now and this takes place since 5 months. Yet, the first I found strange about this man, were his light-less eyes, no expression, no emotions in them, nothing. He also told me from the start, he has a diagnosis of schizophrenia, but he is under medicine functioning well.
The other aspects were strange to me, were the character traits of him, no interest in any other people, especially men. However, I saw him (while unobserved) how he tried to get the attention of other woman, while we were out together). When I confronted him with this, he denied it was the case.
There were many other things he does to diconnect me, of my usual success paths and social interactions with likeminded people.
In any case I noticed these traits, outlined in this brilliant article – and kept a distance from this man. Recently I was ine month off from him, but I’ve got with him again for short. However I communicated to him, I don’t want relationship. He totally “accepted” that – just to start the “chasing” from start.
I am so thankful for this article, I just discovered it, while lying next to him at the pool. I will be now off entirely from this person.
Thank you – thank you – thank you! The people of God, will never get lost, but the right path it’s shown to us – and we get saved!
V. M
Thank you for this beautifully written and insightful article. The psychopath I encountered often communicated between the lines with scripture verses referencing God, which he intended to refer to himself (the psychopath). Psychopaths are all ego. There is no room for anything or anyone else. God bless anyone who crosses the path of a psychopath. If you recognize psychopathic behaviors in someone in your life, run for the hills! You’ve been warned. You will be harmed.
What why are they embodiments of Satin. A very good study, but I have to ask, how did you identify the psychopaths that you engaged with?
Oh my god. I got dumped a week ago randomly and for the vaguest reason by a woman who inserted herself into my life and made herself my own personal God as this article states. She dumped me and this trauma bonding really, really, fucked me up for this past week. I’ve been trying to understand, why? Why does it hurt so bad? I’ve been through so many relationships, why is this one break up so difficult? I didn’t understand until I came across this post. I have spiritual beliefs aside from biblical ones so aside from the preachiness at the end this article really opened my eyes. Thank you.
You are right there is a difference, you are experiencing withdrawal.
Being in a Trauma bond creates a chemical dependence in our brains that
causes craving, wanting, physical and psychological dependence.
Look up withdrawal from Psychopathic Trauma bonding, I was entrapped great description for more than 30 years. My psychopath after years of pain and bad and confusing behaviors, finally did something so bad the prove was there which dislodged the illusion and it took two years of great pain and investigation to break this bond. And yes if we have God in our lives he will open our eyes because yes we are worshipping a false idol. Yes, Satan and Cain were the original psychopaths and breeding with neurotypicals they insidiously come into our lives and seduce us to sin and many have been lost. We are survivors in this battle and it is awesome that we are trying to help others that are still battling their demon, which is what psychopaths are, inhuman, no soul, no conscious, it would be so satisfying to strike back and have them ask God to remake them in his image and if Satan started losing his army, one by one and the psychopath could see that they are enslaved to Satan and under his control, the way they try and control others maybe they would see that their way of experiencing the world is not the full free ride they think it is and want to see what it would be like to break Satan’s control of them. Of course I don’t know a way to convert them as it would have to be choice of free will. I know there are a lot of smart people that have been duped and survived and we would all like to fight back but 1 at a time is such a tedious task. Maybe one of you or a group of you could think of a way to sell one of them on the idea
and once transformed that one could convert many.
Wishful thinking or a belief that with God all things are possible.
If the answer is simple God is answering. Faith the size of a mustard seed can move mountains. The story of David and Goliath. We all take our experiences so personal, we were all forged in fire, God had a purpose in our suffering, we are no longer victims, we aren’t just survivors, we a warriors for good, we are seeing how much we want to help and comfort the victims still in captivity and warn others. The only way to make a safer world is to go to the source and try to cause change, challenging, daring but we have true accounts of the devil being defeated in other ways. The psychopath is a zombiedom victim of Satan, they are under his control, if we escaped their control over us, could they not intellectually see that they are slaves of Satan and want to free themselves as we have been set free. If there brains could be rewired in God’s image they can develop a soul and feel alive every minute of every day without the horrible things they do just for a moment to feel alive, their emptiness is constant and propels them to create chaos and harm to others to feed off of our emotions, like vampires they cannot live without us, but we can live without them. If they think there is no escape and maybe there is not, if there was a possibility to escape as we have,
would any of them want to see what freedom feels like. They think they are free but like us they are under the control of the dark one, if realizing they could choose too be free of their trauma bond, could they survive the withdrawal as we have.
After being dragged through hell for 30 years, I look for solutions and the silver lining that helps me accept being imprisoned and robbed of 30 years of my life, the lesson, survival all great learning experiences but I am hoping there was more purpose in my captivity. Maybe not, my optimism has returned and being able to hope again is priceless.
Best wishes to all that are still in the fight, it isn’t just a fight for your life, it is the battle for your soul, knowledge is power, read and learn as much as you can. Winning battles is good, someday I hope we wage and win the war, without casualties, I do believe it is possible.
Your response was amazingly insightful. I agree with your line of reasoning.
Rishika, there is an old saying the twinkle or as you said “shine” in their eyes is the devil in disguise. Or as the article refer it to as reptile.
Thank you for posting this you are right on it with everything you said you you may have helped a lot of people
Yes – great to hear – having GOD as priority number 1 saved me too! The times before I did not have God and psychopaths/narcissists broke me terribly.
I want to thank you for writing this information. I am preparing to stop the psychopath that murdered my son from getting out of jail, they think he is cured and ready to come back into society. I knew they were wrong and now thanks to you I now have more to present to the probation board and the judge that there is no cure and in fact, he is not even human but a reptile in human form only looking to destroy others to build himself up, and that in fact proud of themselves the more pain they cause. So thank you, honey, I hope you have recovered, we never will.
Glad I read this. presently I am kind of stuck in his spell . All I think is about him. I forgot the role of the Saviour in my life. the worst part is I am aware that I am obsessing over him but I can’t stop it. hopefully, I will be able to escape from his clutches.
This article has helped me so much in a personal relationship with a psychopath,
The paragraph in regards to the dress style and how they mimic is simply
uncanny, This is exactly what he did to me, I would have been completely blindsided
with this person until i stumbled across this article. I felt something was not quite right but could not figure it out, I am at the discard phase with him, he calls me everyday but refuses to see me and at first I was begging to win back that connection and now I am disgusted with myself for feeling what i did and some parts of me still do, almost like i was hypnotized by him. I have read this article over and over and it was as though it was written word for word for him, He found out everything i liked as i naively told him and then bit by bit took it all away, I just want to say thank you for this insight and i am reading more of your stuff online, wish there was even more it has helped me to learn i need to help myself and not succumb to his evil.
I had a woman psycho first asked me in front of her employes in a meeting do you love me awwhhhhh tried love bomb me . didn’t woprk my reply wasent what she wanted to hear . I escaped of in to kitchen . all I could hear was I really love him so so much . then an employee said you better make sure hes ok . then shortly after that scenario grabbed me on shirt tiold me I love you walked away .im not stupid and again I didn’t fall fr what came next wrkrs said to me she likes you when she left kitchen . I replied yeah . then it was after this it all kicked off . started being in kitchen every time I went there . even followed me in to toilets trew hair up its very flustery out there today isn’t it . I just ran in opposite direction . one day I arrived in a last minute thing and low behold she seen me came out of an meeting she was in stood stirring at me in a trance state . this freaked me out all together . she even told her two bosses about how she really loves me so much what a stupid thing to do . then said I believe we will get there in the end hahaha yeah right very funny I said to myself . I could go on for hours about my situation .but short storie to finish my company lost the contract and she ended up in a panic state ran in to kitchen hello gerard ran back out . even took a photo of me now that was down right creepy to . I still have things going on to this day been followed around buy other workers from this place but I am now beging to actually enjoy sereing them in reall pain as im weeting myself laughing at em all .
I have my priorities straight…so I thought. For six and a half years, I have been in a relationship with a psychopath. I will be the person who heals but will never be the same. I pray to Jesus and talk to The Holy Spirit constantly. I beg Him to release me from these bonds…trauma bond? entrapment? All of it. The psychopath, also “knows and loves” Jesus. He can quote scripture better than anyone I know. When he gets drunk and is in public, he will raise his hands in worship to The Lord. I am destroyed. I am trying to heal. I’m so glad to read that that what I am doing (turning my thoughts toward and talking to Jesus) every time he enters my mind is the ONLY possible way out. The only problem is that is 24/7. In the meantime, I cannot function. Another thing in your article I found fascinating is about the eyes. I thought I was imagining it. I thought my best friend was imagining it. They are black, pure black…nothing, nothing at all behind them except hatred for me, which was once (false) love. Thank you so much to Kitty Stevens for writing. That last sentence says it all for me. I didn’t just get burned…I am getting burned alive and the pain is unbearable.
This is like a biography. I have been through all of these stages repeatedly with my ex for seven years. I have just been discarded again and want to die… again. I wish I never met him.
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