I recently dreamt of my ex-boyfriend who is a psychopath. The dream appeared out of nowhere – I haven’t thought about him for a very long time. In the dream I went to his house to take my remaining things.

I entered his house, hoping he won’t catch me there; I saw my bag with clothes and keys, and took that remaining baggage.

As I was going out, at that very same time he was returning home with his buddies (he’s always with his evil buddies when I dream of him) and thus he confronted me.

The reason I was afraid to meet him was because I was afraid that he would charm me again. But this didn’t happen. His charm didn’t work anymore. Actually, I told him something along those lines, and that he looked wasted.

In the dream the keys in the bag were important, and I believe they signified my reclaiming all the investment in him, and taking back all control. With keys you can lock and unlock things, so they can symbolize control. I believe I got this dream as a sign that he no longer has any control over me, and that our paths now have really separated.

I got confirmation that this was the case because a few days ago was my birthday, and it was the first time that I didn’t receive his email greeting. He always sent me those, because a psychopath doesn’t leave his victim – ever!

It was today that I realized that he didn’t send me any greeting, so just to be sure, I even checked whether I blocked him in my gmail account, but I didn’t. So it’s really true that he stopped pursuing me.

In the dream, when the ex saw that his charms didn’t work and that he had no control over me and couldn’t make me upset anymore, he actually killed himself. I knew that he did that to inflict pain – so that I would feel guilty for his action for the rest of my life. But that also didn’t work, because I knew that he killed himself for this selfish reason.

And then a very strange thing happened – after he died, I saw his spirit possess a boy that was the next to be seen in the vicinity. And that boy then became possessed, but interestingly, he didn’t recognize me.

Which makes me think about the time when I saw his spirit so real, so corporeal, that I mistook it for himself. That was when I was still in a relationship with him, and we were sleeping together. At night I saw him rise up and walk out of the door, but when I placed my hand where he was supposed to be lying, he was there! So his spirit is so strong, so full of life, that it looks corporeal!

And this makes me remember the writings of Eliphas Levi. He told that the only way to attain immortality is to identify with natural forces. If one identifies with the force of goodness, he becomes immortal. And semi-immortality is possible if one totally identifies with the force of evil. Those who are lukewarm, however, are destroyed.

That’s probably the reason Jesus told in the Bible:

I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot. So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spew you out of my mouth.

— Revelation 3:15

So, according to Eliphas Levi, you attain immortality if you are totally good (you become the force of love/goodness) or you attain partial immortality if you become totally evil (but eventually that force destroys itself, according to the esotericist).

That’s why, I believe, my reptilian ex-boyfriend is so alive in his spirit body. He has identified with the force of evil and gains his strength from it. But eventually that force will consume itself as darkness is the negation of being – you put the light on and it’s as though it was never there.

Thus, my dream and what I learnt from it. If you have any comments about dream symbols or something related to this experience, do leave them under the post.